Lizzy here! Mom thought ya’ll might want a little cuteness to relieve your mid-week slumps. And really, who better than me? Seriously. I’m adorable. Mom tells me all the time.

My Outside Routine:

Today I will take you through my outdoors routine (Mom makes me go regularly, in honor of my wild ancestors—pshaw).

1. Stop and Smell

From the moment Mom puts me down, I sit there very quietly. Hedgehogs are naturally timid creatures and very cautious. I’ll lay in a prickled ball for hours if I feel threatened enough (which has only happened once, when I was a baby, and Mom just got me—like 30 minutes earlier. All the smells were strange and new. But she held me the entire time, and I had to come out and explore).

2. Get Annoyed (and Do My Business)

Once upon a time, Oliver didn’t exist, and no cats bothered me during my occasional (forced) explorations. Now he’ll pop up and try to play. Every. Single. Time. I’m pretty sure he’s in love with me. Luckily, one prick sends him away…for a few minutes. Plus, there’s nothing worse than a cat bothering you as you go to the bathroom.

3. Run to Safety

Mom’s not the only one in the family who likes to run. Usually, though, I run to get to cover. You know, just in case a predator comes. Mom ensures me that I’m safe, but who’s to say a lion won’t stop by? (I do come from Africa—or at least those ancestors did). If I’m feeling clingy and smell Mom, I’ll run toward her instead.

4. Find a Cozy Spot

My number one goal in life is to find a cozy spot to nap. If I’m feeling more adventurous, I’ll try to nestle inside a hole in the rock wall. When I’ve had enough already, I try to climb up Mom or make her pick me up. Today it worked. I was cute, and she took pity on me.

The moral of the story: the outdoors are evil; stay inside head to Mom straight off, and you can cut your outside time by at least half.